Achieving New Year’s Resolutions are easy if you know the secret.

Not everyone sets New Year’s resolutions. And even if you did, by now, you have probably given up on them.  I think it is because after setting so many of them and not achieving them, they come to the conclusion that: 1.     They cannot achieve them – it’s impossible 2.     They really don’t want to achieve them – it would be nice but the pain of achieving them far outstrips the pleasure of having the success 3.     It takes too much energy 4.     They are too busy with other things after the first of the year 5.     They set too many of them and get lost and confused about what they should tackle first and give up on all of them This article addresses two aspects of achieving New Year’s resolutions: 1.     How to set them so that you’ll achieve them 2.     What to do when you cannot seem to get motivated to even set them or make a change. Part 1: The New Year is a traditional time to set goals and make changes.   Many of those changes involve stopping habits or starting habits or changing them.  For example: 1.     Start an exercise program; increase exercise 2.     Eat healthy food: involves usually stopping eating high fat, low nutrition food, start eating low fat nutritional foods 3.     Be a better parent 4.     Lose weight – slim down 5.     Spend more time with family 6.     Take more time off 7.     Work more 8.     Smile more; laugh more 9.     And a myriad of other ideas that are gone by February Let’s explore the nature of resolutions versus goals.  Goals are measureable and time specific.  They are tangible.  Often resolutions have tangible results but are not specified and therefore, are not connected to anything tangible or of value.  It is easy to set goals: 1.     Make $250,000 by Dec. 2013 2.     Take a vacation to France for July vacation 3.     Learn to fly a plane and have logged _____flight hours by June 2013 4.     Add 20 new customers by August 2013 while maintaining present customer base.  Or have a customer base of 350 customers by May 2013. Understanding the difference between goals and resolutions will help you be more successful at both.  Consider the difference between a resolution passed by Congress and a bill signed into law.  A resolution is often a statement of opinion or expression of public policy.  It is not a law.  A law is something that must be followed.  This is what happens with our own personal resolutions.  They become a matter of ‘this would be nice’ rather than a goal which is ‘what I am going to achieve.’  So we put more thought into a goal and set resolutions, which you might as well start with “In my opinion….. I want to lose weight.  Understand the difference? Part 2: Here is a way to make those resolutions goals and very achievable. 1.      Decide what your year theme is going to be.  i.e. self improvement, save money, pay off debt, physical health improvement, housing improvement, job improvement 2.      Then set goals: a.      Specifically what do you want, how much, how often, etc.? b.      What will it do for you? – attach it to a value – peace, security, recognition, health, love, wisdom, spiritual connection c.      What will it be like when you get it – see, hear, and feel? d.      What are the downsides to having it? e.      What will you gain? f.       Is it worthwhile and ok if I get it; Do I deserve it? g.      What do I have and need that will help me get it? h.      What are three action steps I will take to get it? 3.      Now set resolutions – set two or three – no more – and have them coincide with your year theme. 4.      Repeat the steps for goals. When you set resolutions, use the same process as goals setting – make sure that it is something you REALLY want, will commit to, connected to something you value, and demonstrated in see, hear, feel.  People fail to realize that resolutions are experiences.  In other words, you want a particular experience in your life – more love, better communication, be healthier.  These are not always measurable by standard means.  Therefore, use the Achievable Outcome process, which is excellent for both goals and experience.  For example: Here is how you might answer the questions from above: I want to have and set better boundaries this year.  (This is too vague) I will be happier and more peaceful when I do this I will see myself smile when I say ‘no’ to something I do not want to do, or I will act clear and decisively, take responsibility for my own feelings……etc.   I will hear myself say, “Yes!  I was clear and was understood.”  I feel good about myself and safe. The downside is that I may lose a friend or upset someone The upside is that I will feel confident and free and get more of what I want in life It is worthwhile for my mental and emotional health I have the ability to say no.  I need help getting the guts to say it.  I need confidence in myself What I will do is: a.    Read a book on boundaries b.    Take a class or work with a professional on boundaries c.      I will talk to a person I have problems with to help them understand the changes I am wanting to make Now the mind, your great manifestation tool, has specifics it can work with.  DETAILS are the difference between success and failure in any endeavor. Setting resolutions and achieving them are as easy setting goals.  Use the above set of questions for both.  Set a few or one resolution(s) that you can COMMIT to.  Have a great year!