Words are Important!

Your language is the software package that runs your brain. You are always influencing and being influenced. So not only are you influencing others by your words, you are affecting yourself.

Your surface communication (what comes out of your mouth) is the end result of multi-layer thought process that begins in the deepest levels of your mind. By the time a thought is formed and that thought is expressed, it has gone through many filtering processes and much of the communication has been deleted, distorted and generalized. Then you make meaning of an experience and it is the MEANING you remember, not the actual experience. In fact, Noam Chomsky, in Transformational Grammer, stated that people communicate about 1-1/2% of the total of any experience. That's not a whole lot of information. You can see why so much miscommunication happens.

Now, knowing how to transform little phrases is a start to transforming your communication to benefit yourself and your internal experience. Here are some examples:

Change: Try ..............to ...........Do my best
Change: Stupid .........to............ Interesting
Change: Pain............. to............ Discomfort
Change: Lost .............to............ Missplaced
Change: Hate............ to............ Dislike
Change: You can't miss it.. to....... You'll find it
Change: Please don't misunderstand me........ to......... Please understand what I am saying
Change: It is so hard to.... to........ I'll find a way
Change: You won't fail .... to ....You will succeed
Change: Don't forget ........to .....Remember
Change: Don't miss it .......to......You'll find it

These are a few examples that will clean up your communication so that the listener has a better understanding of what you are saying.

Remember that the words like don't and won't are not processed in the mind so when you tell someone "Don't miss it" you are actually telling them to "miss it." That is what they hear.

More on the deletion, distortion and generalizations later.

Take note, the the more you do delete, distort and generalize, the more we find ourselves stuck and missunderstood. That doesn't feel good.

Small changes can, through time, can create big results.